J. Dean McAllister Bursary Brochure
J. Dean McAllister Application
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History of J. Dean McAllisterAs a child, Dean loved hunting and fishing. He was a son, grandson, brother and a friend to many but at an early age in life, Dean became involved with drugs and alcohol. There is a lingering thought in my mind (which I, his mother, feel that I must mention) that this might have triggered the schizophrenia. It has not been proven as such, although if drugs and alcohol are taken with this disease, it will delay the progression of recovery. In 1985 Dean was diagnosed as having paranoid schizophrenia and had been hospitalised most of the time. Unfortunately, on September 16, 1989 at the age of 25, the disease got to be too much for Dean and he died by suicide. It happened while he was hospitalised at Centracare in Saint John. It was a shock but not a surprise. If there is such a thing as bad timing, this was it because it happened to be the day after I remarried. At first, I blamed myself but I didn’t keep that guilt for long. I knew I did every possible thing I could do as a mother. I suffered right along with Dean. I could feel his pain and when this happened, it was a relief to know that he was now at peace. He is not suffering anymore. I describe this disease as Hell on Earth. 10% of all people with schizophrenia die by suicide – either to escape the torment of their illness or because their “voices” command them to. I believe this to be true in Dean’s situation. Revised 2008 Vera Taylor - | ||||